Dancin' Danciiiin' Dancin' Machine!

Son! Did I ever tell you how much I don't get down with yoga? Well let me take care of that now. I DO. NOT get down with yoga. I think it sucks. It's too slow and you're contorting all over the place, showin the people your hoo ha. Spread your legs and pull them back over your head, toot that thang up mommy make it roll once you pop, pop lock... (I used to LOVE that song! I'd be in the house doin all the dances from the video. Lol. Just like in middle school... except I didn't tape it and learn the choreography! hahahaha) Ok maybe she didn't say it in quite those words but that's what she wanted us to do.

I decided to take a class at the gym today. Once I was in there the woman told us it was 30 mins of arms, 30 mins of core and legs and 30 mins of stretch/yoga. WHOA WHOA WHOA! That said core on the schedule and I thought this joint would have me out in 45!! TRICKS! LIES! AND VICIOUS RUMORS!!! They tricked me! But I was already in there so I decided to just stay. Oh my arms! My legs! I started to leave once we got into yoga because I was getting SO. BORED!! I was yawning, rolling my eyes, all that. I need crackheadishly fast-paced music and activity. The first part had it down and we were good other than all that movement... OUCH! I started laughing toward the end because it was so outrageously taxing on my muscles. I work out but I don't do classes and you know those things work muscles you never knew you had! Waking up will be very interesting tomorrow.

Wanna know why I'm a dancing machine? Because when I got home I had TWO fabulous pieces of mail. ONE, my contest winnings from Liz!!! WHEEEEE!! TWO, MY ABSENTEE BALLOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YESSSSS!!!!


This is a moment.

There is a BLACK MAN on my ballot, for PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. PRESIDENT!! That is HUGE!! I mean if you're black you know where I'm coming from. Did you ever think there would be a viable black candidate? And this soon?? Because no one I know took Jesse very seriously and they certainly were giving Al the side eye. He wasn't even a consideration. We can't have a president with a conk. It just isn't possible. But here we have a candidate you can believe in! The great black hope! (lol) I LOVE YOU ROCKY! He's so amazing. Love it!!! If your state has not voted yet, make sure you take part in the political process or I want to hear nothing of your whining and complaining about the resources your community is missing out on. B.arack the vote.

I just finished a nice big glass of crown & coke. My HU homie Brandi's drink of choice. And so, so smooth. She just likes anything with crown and I mixed very very nicely if I do say so myself. Wish there was more coke for me to make another. Alas, I'll just sit here and bask in the buzz and rock out to Estelle. Her cd is hot! Kisses!


Sparkling Red said...

LOL at your yoga rant! True enough, it does require a lot of sticking one's booty in the air, back-arching, etc. Which is why I rarely do it in front of an audience. Although sometimes on a nice morning I don't want to slam my windowblinds all the way shut, so my neighbours might get an eyeful if they decide to be nosy.

Jazzy said...

Luv Estelle!! Hate Yoga too! It is extremely boring. Way too relaxing. If I'm not working up a sweat...well...I just don't feel like I'm working out.

Plus I hate all the little showoffs who can stand on their head and do other weird balancing acts that my body just isn't going to do!

lmao@the pop lock and drop it reference! LOL

1969 said...

You left the gym....yoga at that and now you're sipping some Crown?


I hate Yoga too!

Adei von K said...

LOLOLOL!! I can see you rolling your eyes! I love it!!!!!

yeah, yoga is not for you. not quite for me either. what exercise is for me?

i can't wait for november. actually, I can't wait for the last primary! HURRY UP Montana!!


Rashan Jamal said...

Hampton alumni do the pop lock and drop it? LOL

Crown and Coke in the afternoon? Alcoholic tendencies? I'm kidding..dont add me to that list of people that annoy you by not knowing your schedule.

Go Rocky!!!

BK said...

just copped Estelle and will listen on my way home :)

LOL @ your yoga rage.. its good for your spirit LOL

Dead @ crown and coke LOL I see you LOL

Jameil said...

Red... lmao @ the blinds! yoga is so not for me!

diva... estelle is hot fiyah!! yoga is so boring. lmao @ too relaxing!! i thought i was the only one!! maybe that's a virgo trait!! i need to sweat to work out!! stace said maybe we have something we need to perfect which would be a better use of our time! so true!! and i was trying to be one of those showoffs. lol. pop it girl! then lock it and drop it!!

1969... you gotta do it right! lol. i was thinking about liquor while working out... it's who i am. lol. now who i'm is!? hahaha

stace... i was sooo rollin my eyes. i need some high impact aerobics to janet or rihanna or something. yay november!!! go rocky go!! did you really just ask me over the phone when the last primary is then post it????? HILARITY!!!!

rj.... HU DOES IT ALL!!!!!! stop hatin savannah. crown and coke at night for me. my sked makes this night. so holla at a playa when you see me on the street TRIICK! you know the sked so act right! BARACK THE VOTE!!

bk... love that cd!! it's so hot!!! yoga is that wackness! crown and coke... not usually for me but mmmmmmm!!

So...Wise...Sista said...

Not crown. What are you, a 43 year old uncle?? (clearly I'm hating)

Desy said...

hahaha @ your anti yoga ways... i can just see the rolling eyes as directions are provided in a 'soothing' voice...lol

damn, you're getting me excited for you over the opportunity to vote and i already did...lol

hmmmm- i just switched up from crown & coke to crown& ginger ale and it is a nice change...try try...lol

shani-o said...

You're a mess! It's been a week, and I've missed your ranting sooooo much.

So, um, I started working out this weekend. Shani HURTS.

shani-o said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Momisodes said...

ROFL about you and yoga :) I've had polar experiences. My first class, I feel asleep on the mat and the teacher had to wake me up, and another class, I was sore for weeks! And in places I did not enjoy being sore :(

JayBee said...

i've never done an absentee ballot. for some reason i think those end up in file 13.

Southerner in Suomi said...

The way you felt when you got your absentee ballot is how I felt when I was standing in line at the Louisiana primary.

For some reason the Virginiaca clip popped into my head and I wanted to say "WHOOP!! WHOOP! WHOOP! and do the raise the roof thing with my hands. Lol.

The F_Uitlist said...

I'm a yoga junkie! It was the only thing that calmed me down after a hectic work day (and boxing but that was getting dangerous.

WHOOO HOOOO BARACK OBAMA. and YIPEE ESTELLE, AWESOME CD (just got back from yoga a little high)

magnoliapeach said...

I almost fall asleep in Yoga! I need some Luke, mixed with Beyonce, TI, Outkast, and 69 Boyz, I need to feel my workout!

Jameil said...

wise... daddy bought it and i'ma drank it! ol hater! lol.

desy... omg the voice! and the "ohm" music literally saying ohm. WACK!! loooove voting!! yay!!! i'm not a big crown fan. i was goin hard yesterday.

shani... aww! you're so sweet! my arms and chest are callin me callin me callin me!

sandy... yoga is not for me!

jb... thanks for those encouraging words.

v... i know! i was like i wish i could go in person!! lmao@ virginiaca!!!! you know i love that skit! booty shorts alarm!!! mama he won't let me do my booty back and forths!!

tfil... welcome! booo yoga. yay barack and estelle!! love that cd, too.

mp... girl yes! lmao @ luke kast and 69 boyz! you took it back! so fab! lolol. i need your playlist stat!

Unknown said...

Yoga is pretty boring. I need something fast and active too.

Oooo Estelle...I may have to go get that.

PCD (Pretty Circle Drawer) said...

ooooooooooh, you're a big dog....with that crown. can't do brown juice! estelle is hotness & exsqueeeeeeeeeeze me, but i love yoga :-P

Eb the Celeb said...

LOL... I pass on yoga too... I dont even know how did it... yoga makes me feel like a straight retard... I am too fast paced for all that slow moving flexible crap

The F_Uitlist said...

YEAH PCD. Janiele andEb you guys need to try one of the classes with the more upbeat tunes. I had one class the teacher (he wasn't quite a yogi) played Stevie Wonder,and he would say I want to see you dancing in the chair pose. ALL KINDS OF AWESOMENESS

Liz Dwyer said...

"If your momma gave it to you baby girl let it show..." Oh yeah, that was the jam! White America's worried Barack's gonna blast that at the first cabinet meeting and have Michelle doing the dances.

I like yoga sometimes but I don't like it in LA. Folks are yoga snobs and it gets on my nerves. Plus somebody always has crusty feet or something else nasty up in your face. Eww!

Jameil said...

miss b... you hot girl!! lol. you should def. cop estelle. it's hot.

pcd... ballliiiin!! lol. yoga bah! i can't get w/it. estelle is fiyah!

eb... i like the flexibility part i just can't get w/the slowness. it's soooo slow!! horrid.

tfil... who's janiele? there's one on oxygen but you are still moving slowly even tho the music's better. bad muzak def. doesn't help. it's not for me. more yoga for you right?

liz... lmao @ you!! too funny! some dude at work was like oh shoot we might get some luther in the white house! LMAO!! i can just imagine the LA yoga snobs! hilarity! i def. can't get with body parts poking me in the eye socket! ew!!!! PASS!!! i haven't foudn the class that's really for me yet. boooo.