Understanding the Fabulosity.

**I found these in my drafts and it was too fun for me not to share so consider this a post-Miami treat! The above was the title of the first draft. I crack myself up.**

When last we left off, I was blogging beneath the coconut tree about my time with the Colombian. So Stace and I are sitting outside the club, minding our biz when the Colombian pulls up a chair. We look at each other like "Word? Really? All that?" He's oblivious in his drunken state. He starts to ask us if we saw the lunar eclipse and blah blah blah. He buys me another mojito... whoooooo!! "Bouncer" and the self-proclaimed coconut king return and we're surrounded. MAKE IT STOP!! Too much. He also asked me if he could kiss me "right there" which was on my mole next to my nose. That would be a no. I don't know where your lips have been AND THAT'S BIZARRE NUTSO!!! We ask the Colombian to take a picture of us and do you know first he took a picture of himself and the owner. What??? Too much. Drew FINALLY arrives to rescue us and we head to his next gig. This one is at a place called Mara.bou Cafe. You don't ever want to go here.

It's a strip mall restaurant converted to a club and they were charging $30/head. But we're with the band so of course we pay NOTHING. I would've left if we had to anyway. No sweat off my back. No one in there was sexy. We head next door where they're playing hip-hop and miss the concert. But why was it stripper central up in the hip hop spot? They kept their clothes on but the girls were the stankest thing since Stankonia. And not in a good way. These were the Monday-Friday daytime strippers with stab wounds and c-section scars. You know the ones who don't make the club any money. The ones who get a few pity dollars thrown at them. Womp.

Next we head to the bass player's house. AFTERPARTY!! Guinness all around. When you've been drinking, Guinness doesn't taste as chewy. We hang out there for a minute, then head to IHOP. That's right Joy and La, NOT WAFFLE HOUSE. For those who don't know I think Waffle House is the most disgusting restaurant in America. Convict food. Please do not put a Kraft single on scrambled eggs with the extra large pieces of ham and call it an omelette. Vomit. How about the dudes behind us are straight passed out at the table. All three of them. Wil'in. We grub then head back to Drew's and crash.

Overall note:
The guys we were around (the band) like to kiss you on the forehead when they say hi. Lovely when they're cute. Not so much when they're not.

Draft 2:
Omg so urban journalista is talking about crushin. how fabulous are crushes? i don't know if i would've graduated from high school or college w/o them. i cannot go to school and enjoy myself without the possibility of seeing someone who makes me stomach do flips. my mom says i came out of the womb liking boys. boy crazy from the start. and a natural flirt. its just great! who can top that? how do you survive w/o crushes. i mean granted, i've had to do it now, but its not as bad b/c i'm working non-stop so who even notices. the only thing i'm tryin to see is the back of my eyelids for 9/10 hours a night. nah mean?

so anyway crushes. back in college, we made crushin a sport. i had to be chief crush-a-lot. i'm sayin ya girl was the QUEEN of crushes. So true!! LMAO!! Here's the post I actually completed. College is so fun!!

Sig Sigma, Who's Got the Keys? (Updated)

Tonight the Phi B.eta Si.gmas in Pittsburgh will celebrate their 35th chapter anniversary with a semi-formal scholarship cabaret. Do you know how I feel about cabarets? (Archive search shows I haven't talked about cabs!!! This is criminal. Count on a fix of this very soon!) Usually of the Alpha variety, but I LOVE THEM!! And if you don't know why, then I shall have to go through my cab rundown at a later date!!

We were off at 7 this morning. Tomorrow, we're off at 8. That means I can go to sleep at 12 today, wake up at 7 to do the hair, and leave my house by 9. (If you're worried about how I sleep during the day with the sun bling blinging a) you dono't know me, b) you don't know Pittsburgh!! Ain't no sunshine!! Lololol) Methinks I can make a quick appearance before I have to leave around 11:15 before my coach turns into a pumpkin (or I have to go to work, whichever). I would loooooooove to be able to stay the whole time but I didn't know far enough in advance to take off! Booooooooo. But my mother says I should definitely go. When mom says go, YOU GO!!

Didn't go. Sorry mom. I just couldn't pay $30 for a party that would just be kicking off when I had to leave. That's no fun!! I wanna see a funny movie. Who wants to come to Pittsburgh?


Project Runway

Am I the only one (other than her) pissed off because the next season doesn't start until...

NOVEMBER 14TH?!?!?!?


*stomps off*


Face Off!

As you know, I read lots and lots of magazines, thanks mostly to my dedication to the gym-- elliptical ridas represent!-- and reading simultaneously. I can't stop noticing all of the articles about face lifts and surgery-free face lifts and how to stop wrinkles and laugh lines and smile lines. Smile lines?? We are so obsessed with appearing eternally 22 that we now want to get rid of smile lines?? I'll pass. I will take those smile lines as a mark of a happy life. The face lifts and botox bothers me because it turns its users into plasticized versions of themselves. Suddenly there are legions of robotic, bottle blonde barbie faces and ahhhhhhhhhhhh I'M UNDER ATTACK!! That's what it makes me feel like. STOP THE WAR AGAINST SMILE LINES!! Maybe I'll change my mind when I'm 60, but I'd like to think I'll have the best part of my favorite aunt Louise's disposition-- a comfort with where I have come from, am and going.

Speaking of facing off, dad and I went to a Pirates game last night. I love Pirates games. They're fun, the view is FANTASTIC at PNC Park, and we had FABULOUS seats just 8 rows from the field. Tickets are also insanely cheap. You can get a good seat for $20 and baseball enthusiasts will tell you they're all good seats. We got bobbleheads, and the ultimate at ballparks-- footlong hotdogs and beer!! But... halfway through the 2nd inning, the bottom of the sky fell out. We'd heard the thunder and seen the lightning and of course since I work at a tv station, I knew there was a chance of a storm. It starts sprinkling so we get up to leave but since we have such great seats, we're just two people in a line of hundreds waiting to get under some shelter.

The rain starts falling harder and faster. AND IT'S COLD!! Glad I'd wrapped my hair (just in case it rained), wore flats, and brought a long-sleeved tee to pull on over my tank!! It was so cold and the wind was blowing, all I could do was continually giggle which had the people around me laughing as well. I was also grateful I didn't have a perm so I didn't have to go through that scene in "Something New" where she gets pissed because she gets caught in the rain-- and her weave magically becomes wet and wavy. It was pretty much like oh well! Can't get mad! I was disappointed to leave, though. After an hour, they re-started the game but me and dad were already at home.

I watched the premiere of "Private Practice", the Grey's Anatomy spin-off, and wasn't terribly impressed. But premieres are poor facsimilies of shows, so I'll give it another shot or two before I write it off altogether. There were too many competing storylines because they were trying to introduce us to everyone at the same time. Plus it was very Grey's with the whole doctors all wanting to sleep with each other and dramatic patients. I already love Grey's and want more of that, so why find it somewhere I'm not intimately familiar with the characters?

Enter today's dilemma. I got free passes to see Jamie Foxx's new movie w/Jennifer Garner, "The Kingdom." But if I go, I miss the season premiere of Grey's which I've been looking forward to since the season finale. Especially since Isaiah Washington was canned, and T.R. Knight's contract was up in the air, but he was re-signed over the summer. And what will they do with Cristina, and Meredith and George and my favorite, Callie??? What to do, what to do??!?! Grey's comes on again Friday nights but I'm never awake to watch it since a few hours after that I'm at work again. They post it online, but only on Saturday after the rerun has played and I may not get to watch until Sunday. I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN WAIT THAT LONG!! Luckily I won't be around anyone who's seen it and would ruin it for me since none of my work homies who watch will be there when I am, but still! Stace votes Grey's. Anyone else? Bueller? Bueller?

*Note: On my embarassment post I said the wrong movie, it was "Freddy Got Fingered". I LOVE "Drop Dead Fred"!!!


Coming Home?

Sigh. My dear, lovable, fickle friends. I'm going to homecoming, no I'm not, yes I am, no I'm not, YES! I am! Sigh. Sigh. SIGH!! Gon drive me to drink... no comment.

So apparently everyone's going now. Good thing I took off for that weekend just in case. I want to go to a game, hear the band and buy some ALUMNI stuff. I LOVE wearing my alum shirts. I could wear Hampton Alumni shirts all day everyday. The farther you are from your school and the further apart your friends are and the older you get, the fewer people you know when you return. So you gotta make sure your crew is there. Who else is going and where are the hot parties?


You are so EMBARASSING!!!

By you, I mean myself of course. And not myself now, because I mostly go to work, with a recent sprinkling of more church. That means I don't have the opportunity to irritate myself with foolishness! I know this may lower me from the lofty pedestal you've put me on (lolololol), but in a retrospective, it's so funny!!

Respect my sexy.
Dudes do, but mostly when I'm not paying attention. It's cool to have effortless attractiveness. When I was younger (21, 22... lolol), I used to try to take it a bit further. And in doing this... I used to RUN INTO THINGS!! TVs, furniture. The bigger and more obtrusive, the better! More than twice this happened. So lame!! I'd be practicing the sexy, really concentrating it and forget to pay attention to where I was going. Luckily, it always happened with someone I was comfortable with so I would just go ahead and fall on the floor with laughter. HILARIOUS(ly embarassing)!! Good times!!

Look up!
I've always been a bibliophile even though my mom was all about libraries over buying books. My mom used to make me put them down to eat or walk. I would put them in the car every single time I went somewhere. That's why when I started driving, I didn't know how to get almost anywhere. The simplest places were like Greek to me. And forget asking me for directions unless you hate street signs and like landmarks (the only way anyone in Pittsburgh will ever give you a direction). It was pitiful.

I like magazines, too. And I love that my gym has lots of them I wouldn't have read. But perhaps I should have listened to my mother when it comes to walking and reading. I always read and walk around the track. It takes your mind off of it and I can only be on the bike for so long before I want to kill someone. I can't read on the elliptical (the whole point is to use your hands) and can't stand the treadmill.

The other week I'm walking around the track minding my business, reading intently, listening to the ipod when I look up. There's a guy heading straight for me pointing for me to turn around. I'd started going the WRONG DIRECTION!! WHAT?! Who does this?!!? I started laughing uncontrollably, walked for maybe 20 paces, then got off. I was too scared I start doing it again! It was like my body had a mind of its own. How do you turn in the opposite direction and have no idea you were doing it??? SO FUNNY!! That doesn't mean I've stopped doing it, though. I just try to pay more attention. Lololol. Don't pray for me to do it again just so you can point and laugh!

Accidental Deprecation
Back at Hampton there was this dude I thought was so gorgeous. Not this one, another one. (I just re-read that. It's another HILARIOUS post. Worth another look!) There were lots. Me and Stace have some HILARIOUS stories surrounding my experiences! I've been boy crazy my entire life to let my mom tell it. I used to see this dude everywhere. He had locks and though I saw him everywhere, it was always somewhere random. Like the ATM or a basketball game. I'm a basketball fan anyway so me and CC used to go all the time with some combination of our friends, even the ones who weren't basketball fans, but it was like, ok now I have to look decent to go. Lol.

Even though he was suddenly around, he never noticed me. Oh yeah, he had locks, too. I used to be huge into locks. He was from Boston and a huge Celtics fan. This was back when everyone wore jeans, a jersey, matching fitteds and if they really were hot, matching shoes. This was him. We'll call him B (get it, B, Boston?). The apartment complex across from campus was the always the hotspot. We used to have some bangin parties at 28B!! Man I will forever have great memories of that apartment. Lookin for somewhere to just chill? Listen to music? Record music? Talk? Any time of day? 28B. That's where I got the nickname Sexy Cookie Lady. My big sister lived there so one day I was walking around the complex with milk and cookies. Hence the nickname. Hahahahaha.

So 28B had a party. Me and Stace of course rolled through since this was our spot. He's there! I get excited. But there's of course some thirsty dude who is all up in the grill. Every time I turn around he's in my space. FACE!! Back. Up. If some girl is looking at you like something smells, keep it moving. Just a hint. B notices me. Ooh la la! And I looked cute this night because one of the regulars at 28B always caught my eye. He had a girl so there was nothing there but it didn't hurt to look cute anyway. You never knew who would roll through there. It was that kind of crib.

B slides up next to me and we start talkin. HOLLA!! You know I was crunk but calm. I'd been eyein this dude for months without so much as a glance in my direction. Dudes rarely make me nervous and despite this, he didn't either. He's making jokes, I'm making jokes and we're both laughing. Re-enter thirsty. Sigh. He says, "Yo. You talkin to the hottest girl in the party." I say, "NO. He's just stalking me." WHAT???? I immediately realize the ridiculousness of that statement (as does he) but we both ignore it. He requests my presence at the after party. I say only if Stace comes. We both ride out and go watch Drop Dead Fred. Hilarious only because B was so funny. We kept in touch but he was one of those, "I'll be honest, I have no interest in a relationship" people. I know that's how dudes do their game now and girls get geeked like well, at least he's honest. PLEASE!! This is game! Yeah. That does not mean I'll compromise my position. You got to put in work to spend real time with me! So for B it was let's watch movies and laugh together. Still lots of fun.


Leave of Absence*

Can you take one from stuff? Just stuff. I'm tired of going, going, going, making lists and having 7 million things to accomplish every day. Every single day there's something else. CAN I JUST SIT DOWN FOR A MINUTE!?!?

Unfortunately, the answer is no. I'm just glad that for this moment, I don't have a boyfriend, or a husband, or kids, or anyone who MUST HAVE my time. Phew. That really is a relief. Work and other stuff is demanding enough. Watching "Spanglish" again. This is such a good movie. Love it.

I'm also getting to the really good part of the book Middle.sex. Muy interessant. Why is this book 529 pages, though? Lengthy much? Still about 150-200 pages left. I couldn't write a book this long. I'd want people to finish whatever I wrote. I'm not a good fiction writer, anyway unless it's based on my life. Write what you know, right? That's the only way I can do it.


Life calls. Again. (Grateful to have one unencumbered with cares more pressing than a to do list).

*I know you didn't think I was talking about blogging. I already talk too much and who else will listen to all this? I love my captive audience. MINE!! ALL MINE!! This was my 100th post of the year!! Yay!! That's as many posts as all of last year.



This will be a cursory view of my trip. The basics, there was lots of food and lots of drinks. My signature Miami drink is the mojito. I had at least one at every "you have to get a mojito here" place. I had food at a Haitian restaurant, a Cuban restaurant (Go to Versailles in Miami and have a mojito!!! Best mojito of the trip hands down!!), a Greek restaurant, a Mexican restaurant, a sushi restaurant (I had eel, tuna, salmon, mahi mahi and baby octopus... and of course sake. It was my first time really eating sushi or drinking sake. Not bad.). We also went to a Caribbean festival where Drew's (Stacie's homie) band performed. It POURED down raining!! It looked like a hurricane or something. Water started rippling as the sky turned black. When the rain started in driving sheets, the fronds on the palm trees were pushed upward and over. It was insane.

This picture is at one of the several restaurants we went to that'd been featured on Food Network.

I saw his band every other day I was there. Wednesday (first night), Friday,

Sunday and Tuesday. I started knowing some of the songs and had to bring a cd back when I came.

Remember that ridiculous balloon I told you Stace brought to the airport? Yeah..

So lest you think everyone in Miami knows how to dress. This woman was at the gas station when we were headed to the beach. You look a hot bubblin mess and I'm appalled that you don't know it.

This is Hollywood beach. There were a million people. I got to work on my tan! And wear my hot bikini! So disgustingly cute.

Stace's roommate's brother painted this gorgeous picture. I tried to take it with me, but since it's about 4ft. x 4ft., it wouldn't fit in my bag. Curses.

We went to this club called Mynt. Since Drew knew the dj, we got in for free and got to stand behind the DJ booth and dance!! It was fab!! Every 2 songs, the dj would turn around and say, "Heeeeeeeeeey girls!" It was so funny. The website for the club is all, "you have to be beautiful, rich or connected" to get in. I was like riiight. Everyone in here must be rich or connected because I didn't see the beautiful people!! Lol. Not guys anyway and I wasn't paying attention to the girls. There were some ballers in there makin it rain.... with napkins. Stop. The madness. You're at VIP tables, ordering bottles and bottles and can't stop throwing napkins in the air.

Stace calls the walkway that cuts through all this exotic vegetation near her apartment "Brazil". Makes sense as this dragonfly was resting on a palm tree.

Next to it was a papaya tree. I'd never even known what a papaya looked like and she has a tree behind her apartment. So Florida.

We also got our InStyle read on! Whooo!!

We also went to Pearl & Nikki Beach. Mojitos!! We had great drinks on the beach! It was so fab. You should definitely go there for a chill vibe.

There were tents on the beach so we got inside!

I also got on the table to dance.

Good times had by all!!

Everyone down there kept asking me to move down and when I was coming back. I haven't left yet! But it's lovely to be appreciated!! :)

Oh yeah... on my actual birthday, me and my mom went to dinner-- Mexican, of course with margaritas!! Yay! Then we watched "When the Levees Broke". Fantastic. Not your average birthday movie, but a great documentary.

Happy now?


Daddy Changed Clothes

Most days my dad comes home for lunch since he only works 5 minutes away. The best days are when he brings food home because he always shares with me. Yay! Today he was wearing green and khaki. What are you doing?!?! Don't you know what today is!??! So he changed. Yay!!

As he walked out the door, he said, "Now I need a black car."

*Also, Did my alma mater get political on the sly???? AND students got on the bus Spi.ke Lee style???? LOVE IT!!


You've Been Xed

You know how when you add clothing to your closet, you're supposed to take something out? I'm getting into the closet cleaning thing something serious. I'm loving emptying my drawers to make room for something I'll actually wear. I cleaned out some of my winter clothes and am about to pull out more shirts, pants, etc. that I haven't worn... probably in the 2+ years I've been in Pittsburgh. I will not be carting these crazy clothes all over the country for the rest of my life. Since I bought the cutest cap-sleeved seersucker blazer in MIA, something's gotta go! Plus I'm starting to pull out fall stuff :( so I'm getting a look at what will be getting its auf wiederschauen!!!

Are you aware that Proje.ct Run.way is just weeks away from its premiere? This brings me unparalleled joy. YAY!!! And for once, Heidi K.lum is not preggers for it! Amazing!! Sea.l was keepin her knocked up for a minute there. Speaking of which, have you watched Tim Gu.nn's Guid.e to Sty.le? LOVE. I just have this thing about shows that teach the uninformed how to clothe their bodies. It's so necessary.

Well, much like clothes, when you add a new blog, or 8 to the blog roll, you have to cut some off, as well. I've been hanging on to some that have got to go. Time to rearrange and purge. More than a month w/o posting? Outta there. Betta let me know when you post again. They call me blog bully for a reason. If I didn't care, I wouldn't say anything. So feel loved.

Ti.red (more)

That's supposed to read "tye-red" like the color. Because I am. And I'm getting a bit of a headache. I need to wash my hair but I just DON'T FEEL LIKE IT. I don't feel like doing anything. You know that procrastination bit I talked about in my last post? I've been beating procrastination to a pulp so much that I'm wired when I get home and can't sleep and just accomplish all over creation. It's good, but I'm exhausted! I just need a good, long, uninterrupted SLEEP!! (Most people would take this time to get off the internet and act accordingly but I'm a blogger addict... esp. since I've added some new kids to the blog roll and some new readers have popped up over here.) I'm reading Middle.sex. Like most Oprah book club selections, its odd. Who's reading something good?

Know what I love about the gym? Reading magazines for free. Sometimes I pick up things I'd ignore in the store. Still haven't read Re.al Sim.ple just because I don't have a house. I don't care about interior design. When I get one, I know what I like and I know what looks good together. I like cheap ideas that don't look cheap. I don't like cheap furniture. I can't stand that DIY stuff typical college apartments are filled with.

Point: I like the magazine More. That's weird because it's for women over 40... LMAO!! I'm sooo 15 years from that magazine! But I like it. It has practical stuff and is encouraging that I should be so fly at 40. (I will be). I liked it so much that I'm thinking about subscribing... so strange, I know.


Mindspacin Vol. 9

I actually don't know what volume it is. It may be more than that, but since I like the number 9 (no particular reason), we'll just start with that. I have a lot on my mind so heeeeeeeeeeere we go (shouts to Vanessa and her booski Slick Rick!)

*It's been on my mind forever to post about the bouquet toss at Wynel's wedding. I only went up there because everyone else did. I don't want to get married next (who on earth would I marry??? there are no current candidates) and something about scrapping over a bouquet just seems so desperate. Maybe the fact that people really have tug of war (:38 in) over a bouquet!! Okay PLEASE WATCH THIS ONE!! The first thing I said when I watched was, "You're throwing that at someone?!?!" It's a bush! I would clearly have to remove myself from that one just for safety reasons. I guess it's supposed to come apart. Don't watch the whole thing. Just start at 1:05 so you can see that monstrosity. Start at :41 on this one. Sigh.

That's pretty much what Wynel's toss looked like. First of all there was some girl in the front who was brushing her feet back and clearing out space. But the girl who actually caught it fell on the floor with it. Legs up in the air. The girl who was brushing her feet back sprained her ankle while leaping for the bouquet. Wow. I didn't even reach for it. I just watched it go. I would've been pissed if I caught it.

*The work ebola factory is back. We don't have set desks so we just sit wherever. One computer. Every time I sit there I sneeze. Sit down, sneeze. Get up, walk around for a few hours in another part of the building. No sneezes. Come back, sneeze. What?! E.bola.

*I left my gym clothes in the car while I went to work, of course. Today when I pulled them out they were cold. How sad. It reminded me of the winter when I had to put my clothes under the hand dryer to warm them up before putting them on after they'd sat in the freezing cold for 9 or more hours. Sad, sad, sad!!

*Summer will briefly return for its final hurrah before the official start of fall on Sunday. Thursday and Friday highs near or above 80. YAY!! I love you Pittsburgh summer!! Don't leave so soon!!

*I was talking to my mom yesterday about the sermon I heard at church. She said something that resonated with me: procrastination is really a form of fear. You're afraid of what you'll accomplish if you stop waiting and just do it. I'm kicking my procrastination habit something serious. When it's something I really want, there is no waiting around, no I'll get to it later. I'm actually getting stuff accomplished whereas I would've just said, "I'll do it tomorrow" over and over again. It's great.

*Now that the summer Jesus breaks are over, I'm going to noon Bible study tomorrow to see how it is. I'm also going to try to find another park to walk in since I have two hours before I need to be at church once I get off. There are a million parks in Pittsburgh so it's just a matter of picking one not far from the church and figuring out how to get there. That's it! Holla!

*Also... I hate TMI Tuesday. I know you guys call me a blog prude and I'm okay with that. I just don't need to think about you in that way. It truly is T.M.I.!!!


And Anotha One

(Since X won't)

Hampton 59, N. Carolina A&T 14

So much for Aggie Pride. I write this for my cousins who can't ever stop talking about their lame alma mater. Womp comma womp.

And this is for Chris: Kent St. 38, Delaware St. 7



W-W-W-Work It

Why does my father try to kill me every time we go on a walk together? I really don't understand. Hence the stuttering. Once we get done walking I get this fear that if I don't immediately stretch every single limb, I will wake up like a pretzel and be unable to untangle myself. This means standing stretches, sitting stretches, lying down stretches, leaning stretches.

This week I worked out at the gym on Monday and Wednesday. I did TaeBo on Thursday. YIKES!! Don't sleep on the TaeBo. I mean I already knew this. I learned it in college when I was less fit and was subsequently unable to use stairs for a week. I hadn't been able to work out regularly for 2 weeks prior to this week because of my wisdom teeth and then my trip to Florida. That meant kicking my own butt was not advisable. Friday, my dad and I went on a 45-minute walk. Today I can walk, but I'm also quite aware of my legs. WHAT I'M S'POSED TO DO ABOUT MY LEGS, CHARLAY MURPHAY?!?!

With my triumphant return to the gym and park, I've noticed some things I must speak out about.
* Thou shalt not wear a fanny pack under any circumstances. DON'T DO IT! RECONSIDER! READ SOME LITER.ATURE ON THE SUBJECT!
* Thou shalt not wear spandex shorts. I don't care what your physical condition is, it's just not attractive!!
* Thou shalt not wear belly shirts. Vomit. If you are overweight, it's just unappealing to the eye and can't make you feel good about yourself. If you are fit, you're just showing off.
* Thou shalt not talk on your cell phone the entire time you are there. Look, if you can't take an hour out of your "busy pants dropping schedule" (name that movie!!) to work on your fitness, minus the phone, there is a problem. But guess what? We're too far from downtown for your work to really run your life like that so I know it's not work related. That means, YOUR MOM CAN WAIT!!
* Thou shalt not move slower than the speed of sound. Dude. How will you ever get in shape when you're being lapped by the lady with the cane who's here for physical therapy? Are you not ashamed to let someone's not fit grandmother show you up like that!?!?
* Thou shalt not stare. Can I do squats without you eyeing my nether regions? YOU ARE OLD ENOUGH TO BE MY GRANDFATHER, YA NASTY!! Sigh. This is why I do half of my stretches in the locker room and that ain't right!!



I've decided on one. When I first moved here, I got mixed reviews. It's Pittsburgh's only (in my opinion) church that might be considered a mega church. It's one of those places where you have to join something to know anyone. Some people said not to go there because it was too big. Others said you have to go there to see any progressive young people in Pittsburgh. Others didn't want to fight for parking (not an issue for me since I always get there uber early since I'm always trying to kill time between the time I get off work at 10 and the start of service at 11:45). Four services and something going on every night of the week. It may be too large, but that remains to be seen. Right now I just need a sense of family and support and somewhere to learn more about the Bible.

You have to take 4 "lessons" before you are considered a member. I know. I was very taken aback and a bit turned off by the thought. Like THIS IS GOD!! You don't have try-outs for God!! The Bible says, "Whosoever will, let him come." (Please don't ask me to tell you the specific scripture. I know scriptures because I've heard them all my life and they just stuck. Here's another, "Train up a child in the way he should go so that when he is old he will not depart from it." I'm like a fount of scriptures and have no idea where to find them... problem? Maybe.) My friend wanted to make sure I hadn't joined a cult when I told her about the classes!! Insanity! Nope, not a cult, just Bapist! Lol. My mom had heard the pastor when he did a revival in Charlotte a month or two ago and was so gung-ho about it that I said, let me go see what all the hype is about.

Last night I went to my first lesson and I liked it. This one was about the foundation of the church, baptism, and communion. It's essentially bible study, which I'd been looking for FOREVER but had been thwarted by the summer Jesus breaks (you'll be happy to know they are over). They want to make sure you understand what you are getting yourself into. So I'll keep going.

How about when you join they do this uber intimidating thing where everyone's standing but they ask the members to sit and those who are members other places to sit so you're left standing. Every other week I visited there were several other people standing. Regardless, I knew I was joining this week so I said, let me make sure I look good so I feel less nervous. So I put on this dress-inspired trench coat

with these shoes

and cream pants. I got lots of compliments and felt FIERCE!! BUT I WAS THE ONLY ONE STANDING THIS WEEK!! I've never been so glad to look appropriate. I like a spotlight probably more than the average person but in front of 400 strangers with no microphone or character to hide behind??? SCARY!! The pastor says, "You're the only one standing today, sista, I guess that means it's all about you." So I waved with flourish because I do like it to be about me. Then when I walked up, there was a standing ovation... um... ok... So, I'll keep you updated.

On another note, these are the birthday shoes I bought in part with a gift card from my beloved homie Ashli.

Since we are getting a winter preview this weekend, the suede pumps get to make an appearance. Lucky them!!!

And when I was in Florida, I got to fulfill another New Year's resolution and get my Rosa Cha bikini!! And since there was a sale... I GOT TWO!! YAY!!!!!!

Speaking of bikinis, I showed my coworker a picture of me in mine in Florida (no I won't be posting it here because the entire world does not need to see me in a bikini, as adorable as it is!), and she said, if Brit looked like you in a bikini, she wouldn't be getting so much crap right now. WHAT?!?! FIYAH!!!!!!! She is definitely on my Christmas list this year!! Lolololol. Yes, there is a Florida post in the drafts, but I don't feel like dealing with it right now.

BTW, do you know how this week flew by for me???? My weekend starts at 10 Wednesday morning and how about Tuesday when I left work, I said, "Is it really Tuesday???" Yeah... that fast. Good times! I want a margarita. A lime one. Just one. And it better be good. MEXICAN!! Alright loves, that's all for now! Wait!!! I have some new commenters of late. I'm not doing an official de-lurking, but if you're a first time commenter, let me know how you found me. Thanks!


Deeply Shallow

Immersed is the best word I could use to describe my job. But in a superficial way unless I choose to delve. Broadcast is a medium which requires brevity of thought. A lot of print journalists look down on us for this very reason. We don't beat you over the head with details because we don't have time. Stories without sound should take less than 25 seconds to read. And that's pushing it. I can look at a block of words and tell you the approximate time it will take to read and how overly wordy it is for a broadcast story.

But I love details.


I get caught up in them. Wrapped up in them. Swallowed by them. If a story really captivates me, like the ones about young children facing some adversity or getting caught in the whirlwind of their parents' ill-fated lives, or Katrina, or the Virginia Tech shootings, or 9/11, I start reading and I can't stop. Those pages which have link after link after link of information, one-on-one portraits, and in depth stories, and video and pictures are the bane of my existence. And my work in local news has me always searching for the link to me. Do I know anyone effected? Was anyone from the Pittsburgh or Hampton or Charlotte metro areas? I hit one link and another and another. Multi-media on the web fuels my journalistic fire. I have to know.

But that thirst for knowledge can also be my downfall. It leaves me vulnerable. It makes me need an escape. Somewhere I don't have to think about it, or look at it, or feel it, or cover every single angle. Hence the blog. That's why though I know a ridiculous amount of current events and browse the NYTimes, WashPost, USAToday, CharlotteObserver, PittsburghPostGazette, CNN, WallStreetJournal, and FoxNews, sometimes I have to just stop. And leave it alone.

So though the day Katrina hit, and the WorldTradeCenter fell, and United93 crashed in a field in ShanksvillePa, in our viewing area, and another plane slammed into the Pentagon, and a lost boy gunned down his schoolmates, and all these other horrific events won't be missed, sometimes I just can't talk about it.



Do you understand that tomorrow the high is 69.

On September 12th.


I'm not ready for this crap. Then the weather is supposed to go back to mid to high 70s. Then another front moves in and the high for the weekend? 60s, lows in the 40s..........................................................




Taking Up Space (In My Head)

One of my Hampton classmates e-mailed me the other day. She asked me how I got over my ex or if I was over him. Though I don't know if she reads my blog, I realized I may have been doing my readers a disservice. I stopped talking about what I was going through because a few people brought it to my attention that he was likely reading what I was writing. At first I was of the, "SO WHAT!!? He needs to know the pain he caused" mindset. Then I moved to, "If he's looking for his name in print, so shall he not see it." Now I realize, other people are hurting, too, and my holding back is not helping. So here was my response.

"Definitely still dealing with it. He was my best friend. I haven't spoken to the person who was my closest friend for the last 4 years in more than 2 months. But I think about him every day. Part of me died, but daily I think maybe it was a good part. I don't think either of us was ready for the power of that relationship, even though I thought I was.

It does get easier, though. At first I didn't think it ever would. Logically you know, but who thinks logically when something like that happens? Not me. I have a flair for the dramatic (believe it or not, lol). Going back to church helped, too. I've gone more in the last month than I did in the 2 years prior to the break-up. I know the only way I'll ever really get over this and move on is to give it to God. He knows why this happened and how I will recover FIERCELY!! That doesn't mean it's easy or that I don't get impatient or sad, even melancholy; but eventually I start to feel better. And now it doesn't take as long."

I banned my beloved bloggers from talking about him (you can let go now... until someone acts up) and would only respond to emails. I still can't read a lot of the posts I wrote regarding him. My stomach churns when I see his name. It was hell being in Norfolk when I wasn't doing wedding stuff and had too much time to think about the last time I was there. I didn't call him or text or email to tell him thanks for the "happy birthday" text (when he knows I hate texts) because I still can't communicate with him.

But I'm getting better.

Now I don't necessarily stop myself from telling a story if it would require me talking about him. One of my co-workers asked me if I "hooked up" with any cute guys in Florida. First, that's not me. I don't do the hook up thing. Second, my choices weren't that great. Third, and most importantly, I need to focus on me right now. I have a limited about of time to be single. Fly people don't stay alone for long. :) But I needed and still need the time to heal. To improve myself and to continue to press toward my goals. I cannot and will not let anything break me.

Rev. Ru.n's thought for the day:
Good morning. Be excited! 'Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.' -Ral.ph Wal.do Eme.rson 'He did it with all his heart and prospered.' 2 Chr 31:3 'It is fatal to enter any war without the will to win it.'- General Douglas Ma.cArthur. 'Do it big or stay in bed!' -P Di.ddy. God is love. Rev. R.un

Can we agree to DIE laughing at that group? E.merson, the Bible, MacA.rthur, and DID.DY!!! Hilarious! Oddest quartet ever!! Personally, I think the best Di.ddy quote relates to him moisturizing his situation and preserving his sexy. Hotness! Lololol. Regardless of the messenger, know this, I WON'T GIVE UP!!


Blog Bully Out

Know what? I'm retiring. I'm tired of tellin y'all when to post. I CAN'T POLICE THE WHOLE INTERNET PLAYGROUND!!! Y'all don't know how to act. I leave for a week and I GET ONE POST OR NONE?!!? BET!! If you ain't posted in a week or more, you should notify me when you return to your senses. YOUTUBE DON'T COUNT!!!

*throws a B-O-O-K at the screen!! (youtube it if you don't get it, READ A BOOK) A BIG HEAVY ONE!!!*


Vacation Interrupted

I'm back. May I tell you how glad I am that I came back early on Wednesday? I got back around the time I would get to my house if I'd gone to the gym. I've already unpacked. This is a record for me. I have never unpacked the same day I returned from any trip... no matter how short. Today, I unpacked BOTH bags in a matter of hours. I also organized all my mail, registered my GRE book online, looked at how much I killed my budget (I went a bit overboard the last 2 days since I spent next to nothing the first four or so), let everyone know I was back and blah blah blah. I have a long list of other crap to do and I'm actually for once having to hold myself back from doing some of it so I can recover from my vacation.

Before I get to the in depth overview, let's discuss a few things from my trip.

* Florida's ebola bugs may get you. Umm... I don't know where I picked up these bastards. It could be anywhere since I went to the beach three times, ate outside more in a week than I have in the last 2 years I'm sure, blogged outside, and walked through all sorts of unknown and unusual flora. The 4 or 5 mosquito bites I have, I recognize. I do NOT know where the bug bites in threes came from. One set is in a straight line, another in a perfect pyramid and another in a poorly-formed triangle. That's in addition to 3 other miscellaneous bites-- most on my right forearm. Ummmm... this is the definition of unsexy. Itchy and uncomfortable is not a good look for anyone.

* Tonight I missed Drew's band performing for the first time in a week. I saw them perform every other day-- Wednesday, Friday, Sunday and Tuesday. Hilarious. I brought a cd back since I knew I'd miss them. I've been blasting "Mr. Babylon, le temps changer" because why not?! I popped in the cd before I even pulled out of the parking lot so I could transport back to South Florida. Ahhh yeah!!

* As soon as my plane touched down in Atlanta I wanted some current news. I'd read the NYTimes cover to cover on the plane from Ft. Lauderdale. I like it ok. Def. better than the Miami Herald. Yuck. Though one of their sports columnists, Greg someone or other had me dying laughing. Good stuff. I like the Washington Post, too. I love that everything for every large paper and many small ones, too, is online. It's the joy of my life to be able to scan the headlines in every major city with a few clicks of the mouse. Love it. I also need some CNN in my life. Let's get it!

* I really need to work on my airport/airplane people skills. Maybe it's because I was sleepy but I was really irritable. I just don't like to wait unnecessarily and the Delta kiosks were poorly-manned. That's never a good excuse to me. You know I don't like talking to people on planes. On the first flight I had 3 exit row seats to myself. BALLIN!! I could stretch out with my newspaper. The second flight, we all had books so it was lovely. No talking. Chris asked me how I keep people from talking to me on planes. One word answers. Show people you're not interested in conversation. Have your book in hand as you board, preferrably WITH your ipod headphones in, as well. The ipod alone is not enough to deter most talkers. I don't know why. I instantly ignore people with headphones. You obviously don't want to be bothered.

* Stace and I should always read InStyle together in person. IT'S HILARIOUS!!
1) "That yetti looking jacket is unacceptable" -- about this hideous abominable snowman-looking thing.
2) "I don't think we should comment on booties" -- because we hate them all and its just such a waste of time!!! Oh the hilarity.
3) "Lookin like animal planet threw up, like a has been New York Jewish socialite." Then she said, "MURRAAAAAAAY!! GET MY HOUSECOAT!!" -- I died when she said that!! Died!!
4) Stace: That looks like... like satin mixed with what???
Jameil: Satin mixed with ugly.
5) $120 for a lunch box with jewels?

* We were also crackin up at Cribs with some guy from Fall Out Boy. Funny things he said:
1) "I love this sink. You can wash two babies in it... and a duck." YESSS!! That's what I've always wanted in a kitchen sink!!
2) "For like a dollar you can cover your wall in moss." WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Consider it done. Wall of moss it is.

* What's that you say? You'd also like a picture and you don't have myspace? Fine.


But do you understand...

how fun my life is right now?!?!?! I'm blogging outside looking at hibiscus plants, palm trees and coconut trees. Florida, what??


And a baby lizard just skittered by. They're not at all scary when they're so small. And Stace keeps making fun of me because I see them incessantly. Every 20 seconds I point one out and she's like wth?!?! Whatev man. Ol exotic locale. She picked me a GUAVA off the tree in her parents front yard. Wow.

Thursday Stace went to school. Then we ate yummy spaghetti and went on a walk around her complex. More exotica. Holla! I'm such a tourist and I don't care!! That's right. I DON'T CARE!! We started our now semi-monthly InStyle read. Stace made three-cheese tortellini with italian sausage and it was BOMB! We were both so sleepy, we started watching the My Big Fat Fabulous Wedding with one of the CAROLINA PANTHERS!!, then Wedding Singers and fell asleep.

The next day Stace made me breakfast, then we went to LA PLAYA!!! THAT'S RIIIIGHT!!! The beach! We had a blast. Jumping in the water, mackin and hangin (NAME THAT MOVIE!!), and continuing the InStyle read. I even read some of my Rachael Ray mag, which I love by the way. I took some pics in my FANTASTIC bikini. I'm too sexy for my bikini. Then we got hot because you know how sun and water knock you out. We went to City Place, this outdoor shopping mall, and walked around, but I had sand EVERYWHERE. That was not exciting so I had to be out. We went back to Stace's place to crash for a few minutes... literally. I washed my hair and we started getting dressed! We headed to Miami!!!! WHOOOOOO!!

Our first stop of the night was Chef Cre.ole. Drew's band was playing there. I had conch for the first time, fried chicken, red beans and rice and plantains, and the strongest rum and oj ever. Like too strong. The chef and his restaurant have been featured on Food Network several times. Yeah... get there! Hot ish. After chef's place, we headed to Amendment. It was a techno night. Before I could even get in the door good, MY GOODNESS!! The "bouncer"... I use that term very lightly because he was uber skinny. I was reaching for my i.d. and he said, "You don't need no i.d., gorgeous, whatchu doin? You so beautiful!" Um.. ok. I did have on my skin tight royal blue tube dress and 3 inch gold stilettos... We head inside where some dude with the natty dread and one gold tooth in the front, tennis shoes and plaid shorts comes up to tell us he sells coconut jewelery and he's so tired because he's been on the bus all day. And??? Thanks for unnecessary information. So out of pocket. GET BACK IN!! I tell him my name is Rachael and we get up to move away from him (there are couches and chairs everywhere in this club). I get a mojito! Yum!!! We go to the patio and bouncer is all up in the grill again. He says, "You are so beautiful. Do you like poetry? Can I do a poem for you? Look, I'll do a poem before you leave and then you decide if you want to keep in touch." Extra.

Another guy comes over who's from Colombia. Yes, the country. I immediately think "Blow". You know the movie where Johnny Depp goes to jail forever because his wife, played by Penelope Cruz, played Johnny hard. Yeah. No thanks. Ok guys its time for the beach again so that's all you get for now. See through shirt... dancing on the table. Still to come!