Thursday Thirteen: How's Married Life?

I don't even see that many people that often.  But everyone I see loves to ask me "How's married life?"  -_- Y'all stop asking people that.  What could you possibly want to hear other than "Wonderful!"?  I think I have an idea...

1) "You can't be askin me no questions, yo." -The Mad Rapper
2) *whispers* "Have you ever seen the show 'Who the Bleep Did I Marry?' This is my life."
3) "It'd be better if he was a better person."
4) "It's cheaper to keep her."
5) "It's fine. How's bitter, single life?"*
6) "We're thinking of starting a cult."
7) "Every bit as excruciating as it was when we were dating."
8) "I've already applied to Wife Swap."
9) "It gets better... right? Please tell me it gets better."
10) "I want our long-distance relationship back. The longer the distance, the happier I'll be. Abu Dhabi, anyone?? Am I right??"
11) "If he knew as much about me as he knows about hip hop, we might make it."
12) "I started running to get away from him."
13) Fab Five Freddie told me everybody's fly/DJ's spinning I said my, my Flash is fast, Flash is cool/Francois sais pas, Flashe no deuxAnd you don't stop, sure shot/Go out to the parking lotAnd you get in your car and you drive real farAnd you drive all night and then you see a light/And it comes right down and lands on the ground/And out comes a man from Mars/And you try to run but he's got a gun/And he shoots you dead and he eats your headAnd then you're in the man from Mars/You go out at night, eatin' cars/You eat Cadillacs, Lincolns too/Mercuries and Subarus/And you don't stop, you keep on eatin' cars/Then, when there's no more cars/You go out at night and eat up bars where the people meetFace to face, dance cheek to cheekOne to one, man to manDance toe to toe/Don't move too slow, 'cause the man from MarsIs through with cars, he's eatin' barsYeah, wall to wall, door to door, hall to hall/He's gonna eat 'em allRapture, be pure/Take a tour, through the sewer/Don't strain your brain, paint a train/You'll be singin' in the rain/I said don't stop, do punk rock

*One of my friends said some of her married friends acts like you're automatically bitter if you're single. I said, "Well... you kind of are."  She looked at me like, "Wow. You, too. Already."  I looked at her like, "Really? That's me? Girl please! Who would say that to somebody??"  Don't worry.  She still loves me!  We're going to dinner tonight!


Naima said...

LOL!!! I may or may not borrow some of these...

Gorgeous_Puddin said...

Just DEAD on the floor @Rapture Why Jameil WHY????? LOLOL!

Anonymous said...

These were good.

Sparkling Red said...

They'll stop asking sometime after your first anniversary, overlapping with questions about whether or not you've got a bun in the oven yet.

Jameil said...

nai... LOL! Do it!

gp... HAHAHAHA! See what had happened was... I was whistling this and Rashan was like you HAVE to listen to the rap. The rap was so bad I had to google the lyrics and then it hit me. THAT'S NUMBER 13!!! And it's my favorite! LOLOL

random... :)

red... hey! they're not following the order!! i get both questions. Hmph.