Date Number 2

Didn't know it would come so soon did you? Me either. I was taking a nap around 2 yesterday afternoon with G(ym guy) called me to see if I wanted to meet up with him and his friends because they were playing darts at this bar in Oakmont. I said sure. When he got off work at 10, he called me and of course I'd already researched the place which, score one for them, has a website. We meet there and luckily as soon as I walk in I see him. That would be because the place was closed down to one room dominated by the huge three-sided bar. Plus he was the only person there who might have been black. No, I don't know his racial makeup. He's extra pale.

I had on a teal v-neck long-sleeved t-shirt with a skinny black belt with grommets on it tied instead of buckled (very spring '08 and super adorable) under a black quilted motorcycle jacket with tight skinny jeans tucked into calf-high flat suede boots. I put that look together to be casual and still smokin hot. Score! And still, like everywhere else I ever go in this town, I was overdressed. Ask me if I cared. *yawn*

In the last post did I tell you he never wants to leave Pittsburgh? Oh buddy. We are so on different pages already. His friends are two dudes he grew up with. I immediately noticed they were the corny guys in the corner when they were younger giving each other titty twisters. You can just tell. Again I'm looking at him like these are your friends. Nice guys, but very goofy and not people I would regularly hang with. Within the first 5 minutes of meeting his friends I thought about him, "Perhaps we should only be gym friends." Men. Be careful of the guys you introduce girls to. They will judge you for them whether its right or not. Some nice girls will take them with a grain of salt but when the only two she meets are odd and a bit anti-social? It does not bode well for you.

To make this as not drawn out as possible here are the things I found out in the course of the night. He could be going to jail in two weeks once he has his hearing (no I don't know what for other than he's not a sex offender and its not for murder. You bet I looked him up.). He has 2 children, ages 9 and 7. I did ask if he was married and he said no, marriage is sacred and he wouldn't be here if he was married. He seemed offended that I asked. Like I care. I don't do married men and one of my friends already got caught up in a dramatic situation a la the wife bustin up in a restaurant parking lot losing her mind talking about she already had to run one off before. Stop. the madness.

He likes what he calls "hippie music" and Dave Matthews Band. This made me even more confused about his racial background, but it's so rude to ask "what are you?" Not that it matters terribly, I'm just curious. He also works out 3-4 hours, 6xs a week, not 2 hours. That is obsessive and you know I told him as much. Side note: Rejoice because I do not feel nearly as sore as I thought I would. As a result I'm quite happy to learn I'm more fit than I thought I was. If it wasn't Friday (which means I go to work at 11:30 p.m.), I would go to the gym today. However, today is my day where I don't go anywhere.

I drank 2 Yuengling drafts. He had 3 courvoisiers and two shots. After the 2nd drink and before the shots, he asked me if he should get another one. I said no. He kept going. Gentlemen. Here's a tip from a lady. Do NOT out drink her and not be able to handle it very well. I don't care if you're showing off and your boy is egging you on. If she says don't drink more AFTER YOU ASKED HER OPINION, it would behoove you to follow suit. One of his homies kept asking me about my lip gloss. "It's so shiny. I like it. Did you put more on? Your lips are just so..." Then when as he was telling G to drink more, he's putting devil's horns next to his head (I told you they were corny) so I circled my hands over my delightfully fluffy afro and said (for the second time), "Don't drink more." The friend goes, "OMG that was like the hottest angel I've ever seen." (Quite likely.) And yet G did. Stupid.

At the end of the night I hadn't had a drink for at least 90 minutes. I was super sober and he was a bit not. (Not to brag but clearly 5 drinks was not a drunk night for me in college. I really don't think that's anything to brag about but my point is, if you can't go hard and still be chill, you should know your limit and stop. Plus you're an adult now. Let's act like it.)

He wanted to continue the night and I opted out. He asked for a hug and as I was leaning in he said gimme a kiss and STOLE IT!!! Just a peck and then I turned my face and he got some cheek, too. DRUNK PUPPY! All I could do was snicker because I was just so shocked! Who does that?

And I didn't throw a single dart. Pause. Wow... He is quite pretty but that empty-like head is quite a problem. It would also be nice if didn't have all of the aforementioned issues.

As I got on the turnpike I realized Sonic was just 5 minutes away, wondered if it was open at 2 a.m. and nearly kicked myself for not thinking of it earlier! I SO should've gone there and then met him at the bar later. Would you like to know why I love my stuck-up Hampton friends so much? Because when I told one of them this story, she said, "Didn't I tell you to run after I found out he had braids? Men with braids over 21 are no good. A 29 year old braid wearin, cake makin, alcoholic, Pittsburgher, kiss stealin, non-marrying baby daddy criminalistic hippie." Hilarous! Stace wasn't quite as hard on him but still less than impressed. You know how I feel about it... *yawn* uninspired.

*I'm quickly approaching 400 posts! Is everyone excited?! YAY!!*


Est.1988 said...

"Didn't I tell you to run after I found out he had braids? Men with braids over 21 are no good. A 29 year old braid wearin, cake makin, alcoholic, Pittsburgher, kiss stealin, non-marrying baby daddy criminalistic hippie."

i had to laught lol
but it is quite true

1969 said...

*Erasing his name from the list permanently

At least, I hope, he bought your drinks?

Pittsburgh....so sad.

the joy said...

Jail? I bet he fought someone cuz he's a drunk bodybuilder. I'm gonna say this cuz clearly you're not feeling him as much: he has 2 kids but he spends hours in the gym? Every day? Sigh.

I think he really struck out on these friends. If it was just you two he'd probably not act so foolish.

Sparkling Red said...

If you could bottle your confidence and sell it, you'd be a millionaire by the end of the week. I love how you pronounce your outfit "super adorable". The Fabulosity is non-stop!

That guy doesn't sound like a keeper. Too many strikes against him. :-p You can do better!

shani-o said...

Mmmmm... I LOVE Dave Matthews Band. I also think your date sounds fun... but probably only gym buddy material, lol.

I'd go out with him again, if he hadn't have stolen that kiss. One kiss, and you know the boys get bold!

Rashan Jamal said...

Are you supposed to bring your friends and get drunk on the first actual date? I've been doing this all wrong.

How do you not ask what he was going to jail for? I don't think I would have been able to move past that.

Will you see him again if he asks?

GreatWhyte said...

Somehow I just don't see you playing stepmommy to those two... keep it moving.

Jameil said...

mav... hahahahahahahahahaha. i love them.

1969... he bought one of them. they were $2.75 drafts. pittsburgh is very sad.

joy... he probably did fight someone. he did reject his friends' request to hang out sat. night b/c he had to spend time w/his kids and he usually goes in the a.m. when they're in school but yeah... i thought the same thing.

methinks you're right. w/o the corny friends he'd likely have done a lot better. to start with: LESS TO DRINK!! he just called to apologize "if i offended you in anyway." i was like, "you were a bit grabby." he said, "i know i'm sorry. it won't happen again." you're right about that one.

red... hahahahaha. thx dahling!! definitely not a keeper & thx again!

shani... it could've been a bit fun without the excessive drinking and the pawing at the end of the night. but since those were present...

Jameil said...

rj... NO YOU'RE NOT!! I think he was trying to be nice and get me out of the house but wow... have you been around your friends so long that you don't even notice anymore what they're like. oh AND he brought up a girl he used to date. we also do this on first dates?? wow!!

there were so many things just popping out of his mouth throughout the night it was hard to keep track of ranking the deal breakers. when you're possibly going to jail, have 3 kids, are beyond obsessed w/the gym, don't have what you consider a real job (he works at guess), what am i to do with you? i just don't know.

YOU don't even like your life and you sure didn't present it well to me. AND he is considering becoming a stripper b/c some dude at the gym brought it up to him. i quickly shot that idea down. wtf i look like datin a stripper.

maybe at the gym. like i said he called to apologize for his behavior but i like it when you think first, act second. particularly the first time you see someone outside the gym. I mean come on.

x... what does that mean!??! I might be an excellent stepmommy!! *i couldn't even get that out w/a straight face.*

La said...


Oh wait... did I miss the point?

He gets a big ol family fued style X. No mas.

GreatWhyte said...

Hahahahahahahaha @ La... a "family feud style X." Hahahahahahahahaha. Now THAT was funny! And Jameil you know what that means.... your future as a stepmother? Not so much... you don't even like hearing stories about other peoples' kids that you're NOT in a relationship with. My money's on keep it moving for $200, please, Alex.

Liz Dwyer said...


This would be a bad date in a romantic comedy movie, but in real life, sheesh! I wouldn't even talk to him at the gym anymore!

He just needs to walk around with a big ole X on his forehead. The minute I hear you have kids and may be going to jail... Audi 5000, baby!

Momisodes said...

I don't know.....
1) Possible jail 2)Works out 3-4 hours, 6xs a week 3) Has his titty twisting friends tag along on a date....NeXt!

Chris said...

Damn. This sounds like Hell Date minus the midget.

Tasha said...

Ummm, does it really qualify as a date if he brought the titty-twisting friends along? Umm, and braids? Baby mamas? Cake makin? Alcoholic? That usually spells broke, broker, and will always be broke.

Adei von K said...

yeah... gym buddies and an occasional game of faux darts (seeing how you didn't play any)

drunk puppy! lmao!

speaking of which, my puppy just got here.

CNEL said...

I so can't believe you stayed.

I was sitting here thinking when is she going to bail? When is she going to bail?

"Didn't I tell you to run after I found out he had braids? Men with braids over 21 are no good. A 29 year old braid wearin, cake makin, alcoholic, Pittsburgher, kiss stealin, non-marrying baby daddy criminalistic hippie."


Karamale said...

find out what he's going to jail for. if it's not violent, then bang him at least once. get something out of it.

Jameil said...

y'all are CRACKIN ME UP!!!

kara... no mas!!

stace... i'm tellin dreezy you called him a puppy.

Anonymous said...

JAMEIL! He has braids? Oh No girl. let that strictly be a gym thing sounds like he might step your gym game up but it also sounds like he has nothing better to do...how can he spend that much time at the gym when he has kids 2 kids? If someone says they never want to leave pittsburgh they need to really be doing something really fly.

Anonymous said...

Any Black person who has NO desire to leave Pittsburgh is NOT to be trusted. Aint that much pretty in the world.

Thank you and good night.

Jameil said...

everything.... i don't know how he could spend that much time in the gym regardless of the number of children he has. that is ridiculous. he's not doing anything fly. he works at guess.

ink... LMAO!! you would know.

p_nami said...

Girl you are better than me...in my mind: works out 3-4 hrs/day, 6 days wk= no job. Need I say more?

Jameil said...

please pay attention. the comment directly above yours: he works at guess.

yet another black guy said...

did i say he was promising? or vomitous? i know which one i prefer now.