Project Runway: Denim Delight??

I'm scared of this episode because I know they have to do something with denim. I love jeans... but I don't like them anywhere but on the legs. It is so difficult to find a denim jacket or dress that I will want to wear!! It's just so much. Plus its been so poorly done for hicks and less fashionably advanced people. Sigh.

LMAO @ Vic calling Sweet P "Kit" over and over again. LMAO!!! Oh that's so funny. You are so unmemorable that your odd name doesn't get you recognition. And for you to be a grown 46(?) y.o. woman correcting someone, "My name is Sweet P!"? It sounds stupid.

That's because you're not good enough Ricky. Sorry. Stream of conciousness. That was on my mind and needed to come out immediately. He said, "It's hard to go to judging when every week you're told you're not good enough." Yeah. About that. GO with that. Make it work.

Field Triiiip! Rami stop. You could totally make a dress out of a garbage can.

Christian: are we gonna meet someone fabulous?
Me: Sorry Christian. I couldn't make it.

See look at this Levi's woman's jacket. No thanks. I love how slowly the garage door is rising. It's cracking me up. Especially because they're ducking trying to peek under. White cotton and denim. OOh. Maybe. Iconic denim look. Why does Vic always look like she's pissed to be there? Christian. Like you had to tell us you grabbed everything you could find. We know your steeze. And he called Rami greedy!! LMAO!!

Ricky. We knew you made your HIDEOUS HORRENDOUS HATS!!!! Ugh. But his idea is intriguing. "Because I'm not from the US my ideas are a little more edgy and fashion forward"? Rami. You know all Americans are like THEN LEAVE MR. FASHION FORWARD!!!! Don't come over here on an American show and wax nostalgic about how you, Sir Drape A Lot are sooo much better than us dowdy Yanks. You got the wrong one baby. Uh huh.

"I think Christian is very immature." "Someone needs to give him a bottle and send him to bed." "Christian is like a cartoon character... if I had hair on my head I would want to rip it out." 1969... I know Prince Christian the Small is your fave but he's getting on my nerves with his ridiculous desire for face time. We get it. You know the reality show rules: be the most controversial, get the most face time. Vic, "I would sketch and my mom would make everything I wanted." Which explains who you are. But you know I wanted that person in my life. A personal tailor!? I'm so having one of those one day.

And frizzy curly hair girl who... JILLIAN! Couldn't remember her name for a minute. She's getting mad because Vic is making a coat, too... because y'all worked on a coat together in the last challenge. But I'm mad that you both made a coat the last challenge AND ARE MAKING ON THIS CHALLENGE!! "I feel so manly working with denim," says Christian. First time you felt that punkin? Denim wedding dress Sweet P?? Wow and no. Ricky you worked for Vera Wang, OSCAR DE LA RENTA AND VALENTINO (who just ended his fashion career today... *TEAR!!*)!?!?! I have never liked Vera's designs terribly much) but the other two?????? LOVE LOVE LOVE!! Tell me you clicked on those pages and didn't immediately see me in those clothes. I'm appalled that they employed him. I know it was for lingerie but still! I just don't understand!

How does Christian know how crackheads talk? I'm dying at Chris muttering and chattering to himself... and "to THE GARMENT." This guy at work talks to himself, smacks himself in the head and slams thing on the desk. We all look at him like he might pull a gat out of the trunk. He's been working there for 2 weeks. I'm thinking I should be nicer... head him off at the pass so I'm not the first one he comes looking for. Not my fault I have high standards and you don't know how to follow directions unless you've heard them multiple times. I'm not going to lower my standards. So maybe, just maybe, I'll just get right with God and not worry about the rest.

Sweet P your thing is scaring Tim and it's scaring me too!! "Happy has it home granny circle"!??!?!? DYING!! DYING!! HE ACTUALLY SAID THIS!!! I just covered my eyes and SCREAMED with laughter. Oh my. I don't even know what that MEANS but could you have said anything funnier?? Hilarious. Jill you never think there is time to do the work. Ever. Don't sit up there and cry. In the words of the great Zulema of PR of yore, "If you have to cry and cut, then you better cry and cut!!" DYING LAUGHING!! "I'm bleeding everywhere" says J and then Rami says "I don't see it." HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You are so dramatic. Get your life together if your competitors are having to spur you on.

"I was sewing so fast I wasn't even talking to people." Christian. I know everyone was overjoyed about that!

Why is Rami misting his face? AND RICKY IS WEARING THAT MESH SEE-THRU HAT!! Ooh Jillian's skirt!!!!!! The one she wore to judging? I need it!! Denim is such a tacky challenge. No matter how much you love denim, there's no way you also love this challenge. "Murphy have another drink." Stace!! The hilarity of Chris saying that with a bizzare accent! Sweet P's has turned out cute. Vic. The inside out denim? I'm not understanding. No one wants to see all those seams. The bottom of the pant is a JACKET SLEEVE Christian?!?!?! I'm dying!! So in love are we twoooo. Fantastic.

"I should've simplified my design." Jillian. Do you really need to say this weekly? Chris... from first look... that looks hideous. I really don't want you to go home for you are entertaining... but this is a design show... make it happen.

Love Heidi's dress!!! Shiny shiny!! I'm obsessed with sequined dresses right now and that one is particularly fabulous. Her hair is cute, too. Chris' is okay. I hate the scarf draped and tied around her neck and trailing down her back to her knees. SP's did come out better than I expected. So did Vic's. I like the belt made of waistbands. Rami's is interesting but he's still on my list for that American comment. Christian... full jean outfits are not sexy. Jillians is way more interesting than Vic's coat. I didn't hate any of them. I also didn't really love any of them either. Again. Denim bores me beyond a jean. But I do love an overcoat.

Again. Up close Chris' is yucky. Sigh. I so didn't want you to go home. Love the zipper outlining the dress on Rami's. That is amazing. Nina called Rami out about not draping. HE WAS FORCED NOT TO!! So excited about it.

Wait. Ricky's crying because he's happy. He's such a girl. Except I have never... EVER... in my life cried this much. I have not cried in the last 4 years as much as he's cried in the last 9 weeks. MK just said he'd wear SP's dress with the right shoe! Love it. It's adorable. I'm shocked. I'm not a patchwork lover but that's cute. The two coats got the most trash talk. How about you don't repeat the last challenge.

Heidi says "I think a lot of people would be into that jean." With sleeves on the bottom? YOU JAM RIGHT!! I need some tomorrow! Nina doesn't think Vic had fun with this. Hmmm. You think Type Aer didn't have fun with denim. Hello! She doesn't want anyone messing with her restrictions!! SHE makes the box and stays firmly inside! Lol.

Hmmm... can't call this one. I think between Vic and Chris. Oh Chris.

Jesus keep me near the cross. Ricky just won and his dress will be sold online. I wonder how much it costs. Let's see if its up there. I bet they got millions of hits in the last 2 hours. Wait Chris is in?? Wow!! Between Vic and Jill? Type A and Type Aer? Sorry Type Aer (Vic). They think you gave up. You're going home. KNEW IT! So didn't think she was leaving this early. DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT I CAN'T LOOK AT THIS DRESS ONLINE UNTIL 11PM PACIFIC!?! I blame Liz. Two more hours?? I'm gonna have to update this before the gym. I'm going to bed. Ooh. Millionaire Matchmaker. BUT NO P.R. FOR TWO WEEKS!!!!!!!!

So I update it now, 2 a.m. eastern. $168 for a designer I don't like and a dress I can only tolerate? No and no. Where's a Michael Knight design when you need one?!?!