7.29.2008

WV the Whore and SC the Gay

I drove through West Virginia on my way down to Virginia, as I will on my way down to Charlotte on SUNDAY(!!) Let me tell you. That state is a WHORE! It was on full display. Bright sunshine, vast untouched acreage of mountain, roads carved in the side of them with overlooks, butterflies flitting across the roadway, birds soaring overhead. That hoochie state was SHOWING OFF!! I remembered the reason I'd selected it as the location of my future winter home. But I just can't. No indeed on the "We don't like your kind around here" folk. You don't like money? Oh well.

I had to break my boycott because I was STARVING (and Stace made me stop) and I drive through there for at least 3.5 hours of my trip. I stopped at McDonald's unwillingly. I wasn't sneered at though. On the contrary, there were lots of smiles. I still prayed over my food just in case. Lest you think I'm being ridiculous, they brought this on themselves.

On my way back from my fun-filled trip, I was OVER THE MOON over the "low" gas price of $3.81. I was upset because I only needed 1.7 gallons of gas. I wanted to fillerup! Then I was disgusted at myself for loving that price. Then I got over it and just thanked God my tank held enough gas that I didn't have to spend $4.13 and really bust up my boycott in WV.

Did you know SC is so gay? It is. Well, maybe it was. This article CRACKED me up!! I was on the floor!! They allowed a gay tourism campaign in the UK, but then they didn't like what they came up with... HILARITY!! I meant to share it with you weeks ago but got distracted by someone... lol.

And today at work, chair races! We went backwards and I SMOKED TP! "Mama I smoked the tv!" (1:35)


This is the start of the race when I was already halfway down the hall. Then I won and celebrated with a victory wave. Then she got sneaky! She was like, "AND BACK!" And I said, "NOOOOOOO!!!!" So I quickly scooted myself to victory once again! HAHAHAHAHA! I WIN!! We have to round out my LAST DAY OF WORK with another victory for me since I beat her in the run test yesterday, too! TO THE VICTOR GO THE SPOILS!! And my farewell party is at Bossa Nova on Thursday. (Stace and I went there when she came up here.) There may be another one on Saturday but IDK (my bff Jill).

12 comments:

Southerner in Suomi said...

Ditto@ WV being sickeningly gorgeous.

Chair races? Love it. This place is too small for all that. Make sure to take pictures at the going away party. I just realized I have a birthday to attend in North La. this weekend.

La said...

Aww man! I wanna have a chair race!

**grabbing my chair and racing off down the hallway**

Your Favorite Teacher said...

Poor West Virginia... Is this all because the state did not vote for Obama?

Momisodes said...

We stopped in WV on our way up from NC to MA. It was incredibly beautiful :) Then again, it wasn't winter, so I'm sure that helped.

ROFL at the chair races! You guys are a hoot!

Darius T. Williams said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Darius T. Williams said...

WAIT - I know you didn't have your grown behind racing in that chair...that's HILARIOUS. We're having health week at work soon - maybe that's a good idea for the office - lol.

So, you live in SC? I'll be there on 8/18 - I'll be in the Gaffney area - you know, somewhere up and around that one major highway yall got over there. I know I'm going to get to the yellow mall too.

Jameil said...

v... i know right! we raced down the hall. we have really long halls for some reason. yay parties!

la... hahaha! hope you took after me and WON!

zack... that helped but more the responses of SO many white WVians who refused to vote for obama b/c he's black. it's ridiculous. and let's not forget the whole kidnap a black girl for several days and physically, emotionally and sexually abuse her thing.

sandy... i know. actually i thought it was just as gorgeous if not more in winter! the chair races were fab!

darius... more importantly I WON!! pray to God that i NEVER live in SC. EVER. i'm from NC and live in PA for the next few days. then i'm moving to Florida in a couple of weeks.

Rashan Jamal said...

I cracked up again at reading about the chair race. Don't you have news to report? LOL

That video is ridiculous. I'm sure there are people like that in every state though.

Yo, I had the same experience on the way home with gas. In SC gas was $3.75, got home to ATL it was $4.13

Anonymous said...

I am afraid of WV. Too much inbreeding over there.

My coworkers and I had a chair race one day after school. I crashed into a locker.

Adei von K said...

The chair race looked like so much fun!!!

Yeah. WV looks good. But her personality is ugly.

Bossa No is BOMB!!

Ms.Honey said...

HAHAHAHA it is very pretty however when I went there on a choir trip and every man that smiled at me only had 2 teeth I was WEAK LOL...

I use to say my BFF Jill and my mom would be like isn't you BFF Toya...great lol

Jazzy said...

You are a nut!!! That chair race is hilarious...you just showing your butt on your last days lol! Our chairs roll...wonder if I can get someone to race me though! hmmm...will let you know - lol!

Your entire first paragraph...HILARIOUS!!!