Better You Than Me

I know I've said this multiple times before, but the best thing about my job is getting off at 10 in the morning and not having to deal with crowds. I got in anywhere from 11:30 p.m. to 1 a.m. That means I never have to deal with traffic either. (Unless there's construction on the parkway. But trying to get around it has forced me to learn my way around this city... the east side and eastern suburbs anyway.) I've also gotten very accustomed to being able to do almost anything without fighting for a parking space, or standing in line, or having to wait for customer service.

I exhibited this about 2 weeks ago in Victoria's Secret. I got a free product card and it was the last day. There was no line, but I'd left the free product and had to go back and get it. By the time I got back after trying to find the size, color, and style I want (this is where I say WHY!?!? Why are there so many styles, and sizes and colors? But mostly STYLES!?! Sometimes I want to be a dude and just walk in and be like "small", pick up the Wally World multi-pack and be done. Just like vanity sizing.) the line is now 3 people long. Sigh. But not that bad and I've already been to the gym and really have nothing else to do. Except... two of those 3 people have returns. Son of a!! So this turns into a 15 minute wait in line. You know me. I immediately come home and write a note letting them know I don't appreciate that! There were other people in the store who could ring as the line grew to 5 and 6 customers. The result: $25 gift certificate and profuse apologies. Complaining doesn't always get you free stuff, but I just need to be heard!!!

Today. I produced the noon show. I got off at 12:45, went to the gym, then the grocery store. Not bad on either front, AND there was this GORGEOUS guy working there. Heeeeey boo. Chocolate chocolate self. I always see people I've never seen before when I go an off time. And it always makes me want to regularly come at that time except I can't because it's a fluke that I'm there then. Then I go to the post office.

Lord Jesus help me!

I'd never seen this many cars in the parking lot but I think maybe it's not that bad. Until I get inside and the line is in the doorway. I check the clock-- 3:08-- and decide to just stick it out. I'd already determined I had to send out the first batch of Christmas cards today. I decide to do a few calf extensions. The lady behind me says, "Are you exercising?" I say, "Yes," fully expecting to be mildly chastized, and she replies, "Good idea." Lol. Me and Chr.is B.rown "Ki.ss Kiss" then I decide I want something a bit more upbeat so I turn to one of my workout playlists and hear "I'm H.ot" by Missy for the 4th time today. No lie. I just kept hitting repeat at the end of the song. I looked at my iTunes stats and it's the most played song on my ipod. Know why? Because it's on every workout playlist and I only listen to the pod at the gym. Holla!

Anyway. Waiting, waiting. 3:21 I finally get up to the counter to get these ugly, corny-looking stamps. They look like they're knit. Womp. Those were the ones that went even halfway with my funky envelopes. And I still can't stand them. I wanted a poinsetta or a snowflake. No dice on either. The post office is trippin. Actually I kind of liked the Hanukkah ones more, and was very tempted to get them. The dude was pushing the Kwanzaa ones. He was trying my blackness. Lol. After putting stamps on a million (or 27, whatever) envelopes and walk out. It's 3:25. Wow. All that? But I actually stayed calm. I was proud of myself. I leave only to be assaulted by this impossibly long line of traffic to get to the crib. WHAT IS THE DEAL!?!? Y'all can have this traffic crap. I just want to work hours where its normal for me to go to bed at 3 in the morning. That's my actual body clock and I miss it. Poor, poor body.

To console myself, I had a honey ham and sharp white cheddar cheese sandwich with spicy mustard on homestyle bread and an Amber Bock beer. I do feel much calmer now. Ahhhhhh.