1.12.2010

My Blonde Friend

I love Stace.  I really do.  That chick CRACKS ME UP!!  Partly because we have a BLAST together!!  And partly because she is SO BLONDE!!  Case in point.  I went to a banquet and the keynote speaker told a joke.  He said, "I'm going to tell you what Liz Taylor told her 2nd husband, 'I won't be here long.'"  Lol.  Know what Stace said?  "Why is he quoting Liz Taylor?"  Ummm... OR.  Why is he doing a Liz Taylor joke in a room almost completely full of black people AND in 2010... And about her 2nd husband which I'm sure was more than 50 years ago and what 6 marriages ago?  TIMELY.  ROTFL!!!  I love Stace. 

I won't even go into the China conversation BUT I have another great Stace story that has nothing to do with being blonde and that I was supposed to tell years ago!  She has this thing over spilled milk.  She might not cry over it but she will be so disgusted she... wait.  Let me back up.

When we were at Hampton, I knew she had this thing over spilled milk.  It makes her crazy.  Just seeing it she closes her eyes in disgust and has to compose herself.  My HU little brother (we all had fake little brothers/sisters that we would treat like our real little brothers/sisters-- give rides if we had cars, help them find books, whatever) spilled milk out of his overflowing cereal bowl as he was walking to his table in the cafe one day and she was like, "Ew. Look at your little brother.  So disgusting.  That nasty.  I don't like him now."  Sweetest guy!!  I was laughing... but the best is yet to come!

So we're sitting with this guy Sol and he's like, "What is her problem?"  I said, "Spilled milk grosses her out."  He's a jerkish type person and he says, "I don't get it. It's just milk.  What's the problem?"  "So what happens when she sees spilled milk?"  "It just grosses her out."  "That's crazy."  So then he decides to spill some milk on the table to see what happens.  She freaks out... but only a little.  She cuts her eyes at him and calls him names, probably curses at him and tries to regain her composure.  So Sol goes, "What happens if you spill it on her?"  I was like, "I have no idea but don't do it."  See?  I'm a good friend.  He did it anyway!  Milk dribbled down her arm.  She SCREAMED.  Wiped her arm, stood up, put her unfinished tray of food on the conveyor belt, said, "I have to go take a shower" and stormed out of the cafe PISSED.  I am DY.ING. LAUGHING!!!  You have to go take a shower?!?!?!  And she swore I put him up to it.  I DIDN'T!!!  But that didn't make it less funny!!!!!!  Oh that was hilarious!!  I'm cracking up now just thinking about it!!! 

We didn't see her for at least an hour.  She came to our dorm (she lived in a different dorm than the rest of our crew-- we almost all lived on the same floor, too) and I was like, "Where did you go???"  She said, "I told you I had to take a shower."  Incredulous, "So you really took a shower because you had milk on your arm?"  "Yes."  "You couldn't just wash your arm?"  "No."  OUT.  DEAD!!!!  ROTFCrying!!!!  SO. FUNNY!!!  And the best part?  She doesn't even know why she cries over spilled milk!  Oh I love her.

10 comments:

Sha Boogie said...

Not the cafe! Ewww, the milk out of there...eewww!!! The conveyor belt! ohhh..what about the 'rotisserie chicken'. I don't believe you! You need more people! Totally all the missing pigeons from the water front!

Rashan Jamal said...

We gonna find out one day that Stace had a deep childhood trauma surrounding milk... like maybe she had a twin that drowned in a freak fruity pebbles accident. LOL

Trish said...

I've never heard anybody who didn't like spilled milk but guess we all have our quirks. Her disgust for milk is how I feel about ketchup. I refuse to buy it for my place and don't want anyone eating it around me. I loathe the smell. If I have to was dishes that has had ketchup on it I pour bleach on the dish and let the hottest water run until there is no trace of ketchup.

Therapeutic Musings said...

This is so funny! Watch Rashan's theory be true.

pserendipity said...

Dear Stace, Please refrain from having children. Kthanksbye!

@ Trish, I SWEAR I thought I was the only one who can not stand the smell of ketchup. Why don't other people see this!?!?! Once, Nadia ate some McDonald's something or other with ketchup and left the bag in my car. She barely survived it. I'm mad at her now just thinking about it.

Jameil said...

sha... wow. i really didn't mean to bring back bad memories for you! lol.

rj... not a dead twin due to a cereal drowning!! you are a mess!! lolol

trish... ketchup? KETCHUP!?!?!? I LOOOOOVE KETCHUP!!! I use 6 packs per box of medium fries. MMMMMMMMM

tm... lol!!

pseren... didn't even think of that!! and she's a kindergarten teacher!! SCARY. you and trish are scaring me!! again, I LOVE KETCHUP!!

Adei von K said...

I DON'T LIKE SPILLED MILK CAUSE IT STARTS TO SMELL!! IF YOU DON'T CLEAN MILK UP PROPERLY, IT STINKS! HAVE YOU EVER BEEN AROUND SOMEONE WHO SPILLED MILK ON THEMSELVES!?!?!? DIS.GUS.TING. THE MILK BASICALLY CURDLED ON THEM! YUUUUCK!!

I REFUSE TO HAVE SPOILED MILK ON OR AROUND ME! JUST CLEANING IT UP WITH A NAPKIN WON'T DO! YOU NEED MR CLEAN OR SOME LYSOL!

I don't eat lunch with my class. I know I'd throw up if I saw what went on in there.

I had to leave my class one time when we ate lunch in the room and a child didn't listen to me when I was telling him how to dispose of his milk carton properly. He dripped it all over the floor. I walked out.

Jameil said...

YOUR RESPONSE IS SUCH PROOF FOR ME!! DO YOU GUYS SEE!?!? I'M DYYYYIIIINGGGG!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOL. So you know, but reaction? HILARIOUS!!! What are you gonna do when you have kids???

Adei von K said...

I'm not having children. they are messy eaters.

Jameil said...

lololol. lies.