So my mini-vacay starts Monday. I'm off for three days. But don't tell anyone b/c one of those days might disappear. You know how unsolicited (and solicited) days have a way of doing that when someone else is responsible for your schedule.
Why does Making the Band 3's Wanita's mama think <--------that is the correct way to spell Juanita. I know I can't talk since my name is Jameil and its pronounced "Jamel." But my mom spelled it the pretty way, not the way it sounded. So stop hatin. Raise your hand if you've been pronouncing my name wrong in your head. Go head. Put 'em up.
So... I'm tempted to see what's the earliest time I can start drinking this week. I have a beer right now. I started it at 11am. That's not good enough. I've been up since 930 last night so its not as bad as it sounds. But I'd like to see how bad I can get. I learned from my producer, "Its deceptively hard to find some place to drink at 9 in the morning." Fell out laughing b/c I definitely understand. Why do I need a drink today? Because I just finished producing my first full show. I produced last week, but it was a waaaaaaaaay abbreviated show at only 30 minutes. Today... 3 HOURS. That's right. The news marathon. Afterwards I wanted to teleport home so I could start drinking sooner.
OMG! Have you seen these MTV commercials where the kids are instructing the parents to use condoms/practice safe sex/etc.? Hilarious. Back to MTB3. I'm sittin here bawlin like a baby watching the portion in New Orleans. Sooooooooooo sad. I'm getting to the point where I hear New Orleans and feel ready to cry. But did y'all hear about people spending FEMA money on Girls Gone Wild tapes, football tickets, champagne at Hooters, getting their nails done (did), and here's the best... sex changes! That's right. Sex changes. Now its not funny b/c there are people who still need help who will have an even harder time getting it, but its hilarious that people would think to spend money on these things!! And that there were no restrictions! Wow... you know how they have guv'ment cheese? Do they have guv'ment sex changes? Are they discounted, cut rate sex changes? Do you get only half the process? Just wondering.
Some other things I was wondering. I saw the largest popcorn kernels in America on the ground near this bakery-type factory or something near my house. Now first I would just like to ask, if I live so close to this place, why doesn't it smell like cake everyday? It doesn't smell like anything. Do they bake this stuff far away, box it up without wrappers, then ship it to my house? Because I see Tastycake and something else trucks, but I smell no goodness. That's what you're eating? Stuff they box w/o wrappers and ship to be wrapped? Nasty. So the popcorn. I see this dude standing amongst it the other day and I'm disgusted. But then I decide he's there to clean up that mess. Today I see it again and I'm like WHAT'S THE DEAL?! Guys. I've never been here in spring. I had to look waaaaaaaay up to the top of the giant tree... They were flower petals. Word life. (the funniest phrase in the world to me) I have never, EVER seen a flower bearing tree that large. And though you now think my perception is severely skewed, let me just say this tree is at least 20 feet tall. Now imagine the flowers. Let ya mind go free.
Beer number too now. (And I PROMISE I had all these thoughts prior to a single drink, tho I am quite tired). Watching Rev. Run's House now. Nice. Love this show. LOVE! But not as much as I love el bf-o (yeah that's right Karamale and Cuban Stace, that's Spanish for "the bf"). He'll be here in 12 days, 8 hours and 2 minutes Whooooo hooooooooooo!! Next thought. I saw a dead raccoon on the way home. I thought to myself, is there raccoon peer pressure? Like the raccoon in the street. What possessed him to cross the street at that moment? Was he thinking, I can beat this. I know I can beat this. That big ass deer with the bright eyes growling up the hill at me can't touch this. (that's how they see cars) I'm goin for it. Raccoon friend, "Don't do it Billy." Raccoon Hater, "Do it. I bet you won't do it. I bet you're scared." Original Raccoon, "I bet I will, I bet I will." RH, "I bet you won't, I bet you won't." OR, "YES I WILL!! *BOOF!* @#@^%$%^" *RH walks away shaking head and laughing* "Stupid."
Now THAT'S imagination. Don't hate. I have an inquisitive mind. Its called genius. Get in my mindspace son. And I'm out. *swagger*