I absolutely hate having kitchen failures. It's fine if I cook something and one of us doesn't like it... Unless that one of us is Rashan and I cooked a lot of it. I don't like leftovers for more than a day or two. He can eat them until they're gone. My main issue with leftovers is eating the same thing day after day. I need variety in my life. There's not a single thing I want to eat daily. There's barely anything I want to eat once a week every week for a month.
But when I say kitchen failures, I mean flat out FAILURE. Like no one can eat that because it's inedible. It almost never happens. But when it does, I moan and wail and gnash my teeth and metaphorically tear my hear. Yes. I go biblical. A little dramatic? Mayhaps. But I don't like losing. Or failing. Monday was my food loser day (for the year I hope). I set out to cook Tyler Florence's ultimate fried chicken. I just knew I was going to rock this out! My mom doesn't know how to fry chicken? No matter! I will fry this chicken up and work it out!
I set my peanut oil up and put in my aromatics (fresh herbs, garlic still in the husk) and got ready to show that chicken who's boss! It was smelling amazing! Except it seemed like it was taking a long time to come to temp... Hmm... Let me turn up the heat a little. MISTAKE!! Garlic burned, oil ruined. And now? Out of control smoke. OUT OF CONTROL!!! Setting off the smoke detector twice out of control. The most smoke I've ever seen in a kitchen out of control. Smokier in the house than some bars that still allow smoking out of control. Open all the windows and the front door and it still takes the good part of an hour to become inhabitable again OUT OF CONTROL.
Y'all. What!? But my chicken was already marinating in lime juice so I moved to plan B... oven fried chicken. I'd made it before and it was delicious and crunchy. I needed redemption! I also needed to finish this salad with Ty's Ultimate Vinaigrette. I added it to romaine and feta. Then I decided to "bake" AKA microwave in plastic wrap for 8 minutes some small potatoes to mash with crema, salt, pepper, milk & a drizzle of olive oil. It was all good. But that vinaigrette? Tyler! Yes! That vinaigrette was all the king's horses and all the king's men! I could even have it either sans sugar or with less sugar. It was really really tasty. Rashan looked at me like, "For real? Yes!" Can I say it? REDEEMED! And PHEW! I've become so much better at rolling with the punches!
Then at 2 a.m. I wanted a biscuit. Like really wanted it. Like so bad I looked up recipes. I have no buttermilk and no lemon to make buttermilk. What to do... keep looking. I found a buttermilk-less biscuit that took 25 minutes including prep time and got to work. By 2:30 we were eating AMAZING biscuits from scratch slathered with peach preserves. NOW I'M REDEEMED!! Hmph! (Ordinarily there would be pictures to go with this post but me, my phone and blogger are in a fight so just "imaginate" if you will...)
Except... when I tweeted about wanting a 2 a.m. biscuit, someone told me that was a really specific craving and asked if there was something I wanted to share. Y'all... I'll share it here first. I'M NOT PREGNANT. Oh. That. The point of the tweet was to show if I want something, I get up and cook it. Not a subtle hint that I am with child. Jesus take the wheel.